heaven / shadowheart

[midway]

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[midway]

[ Shifts slightly to accommodate her, relaxed and pensive. ]

Neither do I. [ Because he missed half of trial. ] But we scraped by somehow.

[ Which isn't a great feeling. ]

You know, I've encountered a lot in my life, and maybe this is just hindsight talking but it always felt like the hardships were part of some bigger narrative or purpose.

But this... Every week. Feels just like senseless torture.

[sacredpath]

[she laughs a little bit at that.]

I have never felt my hardships had narrative purpose. Even when they were supposed to. [after all, what is religion but the belief that your hardship is part of a narrative.] Will it hurt if I accuse that this may be a particular delusion of royalty?

[midway]

[ He pauses like she just changed his entire worldview. ]

...

Wow, I think you're right.

[ Is this... 1% privilege? ]

[sacredpath]

[help. she has to laugh at that.]

Sorry. I'm sure it hurts.

[midway]

[ It's okay, he chuckles a little too. ]

The fact that I'm not as much as an everyman as I thought? Maybe. [ Says the guy who can't cook or wash dishes. ] But... I don't know. It can be a freeing way to think too, I guess.

[sacredpath]

Did you think you were an everyman?

[midway]

[ ... ]

No, of course not.

... I thought maybe I could understand a little though, what it's like to be one.

[sacredpath]

I can see it. [humming, the desire to continue to tease him weighing against what she actually thinks of him.] I've never met kings before - the best I can do is a duke's son. But I do think you must be significantly more normal than most?

I wouldn't have guessed if you hadn't said.

[midway]

[ He doesn't seem particularly offended, in any case. ]

I do often get told off by the other lords for not acting like a proper noble. I wasn't exactly raised like a regular Fódlan noble, so it's not too surprising that I turned out a little different.

[sacredpath]

I bet they don't like that, no. How were you raised, then? To turn out so differently?

[midway]

Well, to say that I was "raised" in the first place is a bit of a stretch.

I lived with my parents until I was 17 and taken in by the Riegan noble house, and my parents had a pretty hands off approach to child rearing.

[sacredpath]

That doesn't sound so unusual for nobility, from what I'e heard.

[isn't hands off child rearing kind of the cliche...]

[midway]

Ah, well. I didn't have a nanny or anything either.

My father was the sort who thought his children should make their own way through the world.

[sacredpath]

...Well, alright. I admit, that is less ordinary. Really, just on your own entirely?

[midway]

Well, not entirely. I did get shelter and food.

[ He wasn't like Dimitri who was abandoned in the woods. ]

But say if someone tried to kill me... That was on me to figure out. As far as my parents were concerned, strength was the only characteristic you needed. So no time for figuring out which fork to use with fish, and which to use with rice.

[sacredpath]

...That's awful, and this from someone who may have simply been left in the woods to be eaten by wolves. [yeah same dimitri.] I'm sorry, Claude.

[midway]

[ help ]

It's alright. I do think it prepared me for the trials I faced later on in life. [ can you even be a protagonist without trauma? ] ... In any case, I do hope you're parents didn't actually leave you in the woods.

[ wait, is it better to hope they died or something instead? ]

[sacredpath]

I hope so, too.

[but it's a relatable worry - is it better to have been lost from someone who didn't look for you, or to have been orphaned?]

I think a lot of things prepared me for trials later in life, but I still wish they hadn't happened?

[midway]

[ He slumps a little, looking tired. ]

Yeah, me too. [ ... ] Is it privileged to say I'd take having had a happy family over kingship?

[sacredpath]

No.

[sincere.]

I wouldn't even want to be a king. I certainly never spent any time wishing that was my lot in life. [which is more than can be said for having a family.]